Imitating Delight
What does delightful learning look like for you? Do you have a contemplative habit? A regular practice of spending time thinking, going deep, and delving into soul-nurturing and beautiful activities?
“The most important thing every teacher should understand is that teaching is the art of being imitated,” Andrew Kern wrote in Forging a Likeness, “If you want a student to perceive a truth, you have to embody it. That’s what teaching is. When you teach, whether you intend to or not, you are saying to your students, ‘imitate me’.
Make yourself worthy of imitation.”
If we would like our children to practice deep thinking, contemplate big ideas, and relish truth and beauty as they go about their learning, perhaps we should make that a habit ourselves.
This is counter cultural (as are so many worthwhile pursuits, don’t you think?).
We moderns are obsessed with productivity- it goes against the grain to stop checking things off a list long enough to really go deep, enjoy, and steep ourselves in a new idea or skill.
Making time for delight in our own lives is not about adding to the to-do list, but rather about kindling the flame and igniting enthusiasm.
There are a million ways to encounter the truth, goodness, and beauty in the world every day.
For some it may look like learning to watercolor, for others reading through a tome of T.S. Eliot.
You might learn to learn how to dip candles, identify the trees in your neighborhood, write blog posts, or take care of an aquarium tank full of fish.
This won’t look the same for all of us, but the one common thread is that to imitate delight in our lives is to mindfully engage in truth, goodness, and beauty as a regular part of life.
I bought a Waldorf curriculum. It isn’t our liberal arts core instead its our muse. Now we start every school day with singing. Instead of filling in workbooks we make main lesson books with big, colorful crayon drawings. I tell stories more. We actually do handicrafts (sometimes). We learn about patterns poetically through form drawing. I think the hardest thing to me is counting things as work well done when it doesn’t produce a worksheet and a checkmark in someone’s assigned box for the day.
This past year we all started keeping a nature journal. I used to take art lessons as a child and a teen. Now I am rediscovering so much joy in drawing again. I noticed our kids mostly draw in their journals when they see me drawing in mine. I would love to start playing the piano alongside our kids. I’ve also become more intentional in setting a pretty table, at least once in a while… picking flowers.
You, ladies, offer so much inspiration. Thank you!
We had FIne Art Friday today! It was a mess, we imitated a Van Gogh painting. But I did it with the kids! It was great fun to play with all the colors. I made a painting very unlike any I have ever done before. I think I am going to try more. :)
I want to click “like” on this comment. :)
Recently, I’ve been trying very hard to model putting my iPhone down. My teen girls each have their own, and my boys all share an iPod Touch. Things were getting a bit out of control … so many good things to do: Instagram, Kindle’s app, MLB’s app, FaceTime, texting, Vine (OK, that one’s not-so-good) etc. After I took a hard look at things, I realized that they were mostly imitating me. Putting them down has been something that has given us all more free time to pursue other things (the things we can really delight in). It’s also something that I have to continually pay attention to … every few weeks I notice everyone has their device in their hand more and more often, and I have to reel everyone back in.
I think it’s important to model delight in reading books. A long while back, Living Books Library posted 10 books to help with that. I’m about half way through Hard Times by Dickens. It’s taking me so long … but they have seen me stick with it. I’m also happily reading through SLJ’s Top 100 Children’s Novels (think Newberry-ish). And, of course, it’s MOST important that they see us reading our Bibles. Every day. Just reading.
Like a few other moms mentioned, at the top of my list is piano. I took lessons as a chlild, and would love to take it up again. Simple things like playing our Folksongs and Hymns would be enough. I need to carve out my First 20 Hours!!! I love researching and note taking … my children see me doing that on an almost daily basis. I have books, and papers, and notebooks, and ink pens everywhere (perhaps I should model organization here:)! I also thrive in a tidy home, and lose my mind in a messy home. Making my bed, keeping up with laundry, and doing other daily chores brings me delight, and pays off BIG time in the imitation dept!
Also, my husband is starting to plan for his PhD, and will have to know German and French. He recently started on his German … and asked if I’d want us to learn as a family … … I almost said — “NO! Prima Latina is on my WishList this year, and really?!?! … I have Lyrical Language’s Spanish sitting on the shelf collecting dust!!!” But I decided against that, because having the kids see their dad learn German, and learning alongside him will be HUGE!
I want to add that I’ve read all the posts here at SS, and have LOVED every. single. one! What and encouraging place — I’m looking forward to the community that is being built here.
Love to you all, xo
Kathi
I was so inspired by this post this morning that when my husband took the baby and let me sleep in, I just prayed, thought, and dreamed about whether I’m worthy of imitation. It was the most peaceful morning. Ideas just flooded my mind and I’m again blown away by the unveiling of this Schole Sisters space.
I find myself really noticing the cornfields here, pondering heavily the food world and how we have taken such a beautiful crop like corn and made it controversial. I visited my old high school today for the first time in ten years, watching our young cousin in a cheerleading performance, and I let myself just watch the pure joy in the kids faces, shutting out any negative flashbacks from the past. I’m working on my writing, which has been such a joy of homeschooling, and I’m peaceful in the decision to have my oldest go to school as we embark on Classical Afterschooling. Here in our hometown, public school is very biblically-based, very small and quaint, and very social, full of music, art, gym, outdoor time, and good reading. I’m peaceful in the fact that having my fifth baby this winter makes school an okay choice for my daughter’s overflowing social self. I told her to just have fun with tests and assignments she doesn’t like, that grades doesn’t matter, and that she can lose herself in art projects and reading circles. It’s surprising that we have come to this decision, but it’s peaceful for our family because of the amount of time we spent driving hours and hours from one homeschool co-op to another. So, the learning continues in our family, for the adults, and the kids, but it may look a little hybrid homeschool / school this year, and I’m excited to work on being worthy of imitation as I volunteer to read aloud beautiful literature in her classroom and in my homeschool. Thank you again, Sarah, for this post which inspired me to really quiet my mind and go deep.
That’s really beautiful, Lisa. I just want to encourage you in your decision by saying we did the same thing for a few years. We’re back to homeschooling now, but those years in school were, for the most part, good for all of us. Your town and school situation sounds ideal. Congratulations on your fifth baby! :)
Thank you Phoebe. Your reply means so much to me.
I wanted to add that if you ever feel guilty about trying to make time for your own learning or projects, Karen Andreola has a talk that is so refreshing and encouraging. You can buy it on CD here – http://momentswithmotherculture.blogspot.com/p/what-is-mother-culture.html . It is really worth a listen!
I do a lot of reading of challenging books to keep my mind engaged, and I also am brushing up on my Spanish skills with Duolingo. We’re also trying to have a drawing evening where we all sit down at the table once a week and draw together. It is hard to make it work with a 2 yo and a baby, but we’re managing to do it at least a little bit! We’re talking about buying a digital piano, and if so I’ll be playing that too. It makes such a difference in the home when I am engaged in good books, poetry, and my own learning.
I started writing letters to a dear friend last year, moving from college ruled school paper and a ball point pen in manuscript to beautiful paper from Papyrus, a fountain pen and my best cursive (which is abysmal but I try). My children have seen me do this and now my two older have decided to ask for fountain pens for school use and they will be learning Spenserian penmanship.
On Sundays, I try to make a beautiful meal for us, with meat and everything! We get out the pretty tablecloth and set the table with all of our nice serving dishes.
I just attended a Mom’s Night Out with members of our homeschooling group. It took place at another mom’s house. The walls of her home displayed the most colorful, vibrant, real paintings. they were of lovely landscapes and themes from nature mostly. I have a degree in art, and been struggling with doing anything with art really ever since I started having children, (we have 6 and our oldest is almost 13).These vibrant, free paintings inspired me to try something new. I can’t wait to spend time delving into this and exploring the beauty and richness of colors and forms on a canvas. I have always admired the great masters of the Renaissance era- and have always concentrated my efforts on perfection and richness. Somehow my pursuit of perfection has stopped me from doing anything with my art over years for fear of not measuring up to my own standard. Seeing the freedom and brilliance and, really, joy exuded by the paintings at my friends house gave me the idea that maybe I could try that- take a risk, make mistakes and maybe find joy in painting in my own way. :)
My kids know I have an art degree. But they never see me enjoying art. I think I shall try.
I’m like Sherry above who loves to read, think, and discuss. Getting up before the kids is not practical for me, but I do announce when I’m going into my room for quiet, personal prayer (we also pray together in the mornings). I read throughout the day in snatches usually while snuggling the baby as she naps. When the kids see me reading, being book lovers themselves, they tend to let me read uninterrupted unless it’s truly important. Probably the biggest unrelated-to-homeschooling thing I did for my own delight is to join the Daughters of the British Empire (my English heritage goes way back, but the founder insisted I join anyway). It is refreshing for me to go to the meetings once a month for tea and chatting with other women about England, travel, and history. I also love going to my friend’s Moms Book Club, which is homeschool related but is a lot of fun. Like a lot of homeschool moms, I’ve integrated my children into my delights: going to botanical gardens, museums, nature centers, festivals, historical sites and, when we can afford it, restaurants and concerts.
Having tea with the Daughter’s of the British Empire sounds so wonderfully lovely and proper too! I love the picture that creates in my mind’s eye!
There are chapters around the U. S. It was founded by British wives of American soldiers around WWI. Some members are like me–my closest British ancestor is my Irish great-grandmother. Others are actually British subjects. I have especially loved getting to know the women who were children during WWII and hearing about their experiences. I definitely recommend checking it out if you love tea and Britain! :)
What would be included in a math journal?
What comes to mind for me are concepts I’m struggling to grasp, practice problems, shapes, doodles even. Maybe explanations of solutions written in my own words…
I wrote a little bit about what’s in mine above in response to the same question from Phoebe.
There is a great Pinterest board I follow dedicated to Math Journals. http://www.pinterest.com/cece09/math-notebook-or-journal-ideas/
I just had a moment of clarity – I had my DS keep one for when we were learning multiplication. I realize now that the facts we worked on with the math journal are the ones he knows. I guess I’m going back to the math journal this year!
You might try including some doodles in your math notebook. These videos might inspire https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLF7CBA45AEBAD18B8.
Thanks for the great suggestions:) Math has always been easier for my oldest than LA, so we always just rush through it . I wanted to have them celebrate their strengths a bit this year, but wasn’t quite sure how to celebrate Math. These suggestions are just what I needed.
So many lovely things to do! I sometimes wonder if it is selfish of me to homeschool so that I have an excuse to delve into delightful ways of living. My greatest struggle is not letting myself drift into the online world when I am lazy or fretful or fearful or bored and thereby miss better things (this blog is, of course, a notable exception!)
I am working on three big things right now:
1) Learning to love poetry, which has not come naturally to me.
2) Learning French (which I finally decided on as our first language, not because it is practical or easy, but because it has always drawn me).
3) Learning to listen to music like my musician husband, and maybe even to try playing the piano again and singing with my children even though it might sound terrible.
And on the music note, I thought some of you might enjoy the site called All of Bach (http://allofbach.com/en/). It is the most beautiful site, and every Friday they post a new performance. I am trying to listen to each one with intention (not just while doing the dishes) and hopefully the kids will notice me actually paying attention to the music. Ken Myers and my husband have convicted me that music is not meant to be background noise…
Thanks for linking the Bach site!
I know what you mean about music not being background noise. That’s why I have trouble having it playing when I’m not able to actually listen. :) Music says things when words fall short, so it’s important to listen.
Yes, thanks for the Bach site!
Learning to love poetry- me too! I just got E.D. Hirsch’s “How to Read a Poem and Fall in Love with Poetry” and it’s on my own reading list for the upcoming year. :) My oldest daughter loooooves poetry and I want to learn to love it too. :)
Activities that come naturally for me are reading, thinking, discussing (I love one on one deep discussions), reading aloud to my family, and keeping a commonplace book. I love good quotes.
I enjoy reading all of the comments here. They give me fresh ideas of different activities to possibly pursue. Oh, how I wish I had time to take piano lessons. I’m not sure I could squeeze that in. Hmmm, something to ponder. :)
I would like to return to my knitting. I bought a knitting course last fall and have done none of it because hectic family year. I have these designs in my head though that I wish to make for the kids. I love to start with a string and form it into something warm fuzzy and beautiful. Taking time while the girls are listening to an audio book to sit next to them and do this woud be good for all of us!
Jessica, handcrafts are a perfect example of delighting in beauty and in creating!
I crochet with thread and have made enough lace doilies to cover many tables, but I will never make a tablecloth. I consider myself to be adding a little bit of beauty to the world every time I finish one, and they are scattered in the four corners of the world. In December last year, I learned to knit socks–the only thing I ever wanted to knit, really, besides lace–and then I discovered lace socks. Yes! I listen to audiobooks while I do these things, and it is my favorite kind of “me” time. This reminds me that I want to knit socks for my three girls for Christmas, and probably need to get started!
I’ve noticed that I’ve started several things for the sake of my kids that I now continue for my own sake. I started keeping a nature notebook because it was the “thing to do” and now I’ve become an avid (although still very un-knowledgeable) bird watcher.
I began setting aside time to draw so that they could learn, more I like to do it myself.
I started to learn how to go about teaching math in an accessible way and now I keep a math journal myself and have begun to enjoy playing with numbers just because.
I began to be intentional about including poetry in our days because I was supposed to, I continue because I can’t get enough of it!
It’s so amazing how this journey that was supposed to be all about them has now become increasingly a way to nurture myself along with them.
I love the idea of a math notebook! That is one area of my education that fell woefully short. I want to learn alongside my kids and hopefully develop an appreciation of the beauty of math.
Lisa, I think that is the great secret about homeschooling: that WE (their teachers) are transformed by it. :)
When others ask why I homeschool I often tell them that I want to have the kind of education I never had…I have learned so much from being on this journey with my kids! I love reading children’s books that I was never exposed to, learning history as a story of our world, exploring and discovering nature and so much more.
Oh me too, absolutely. :)
What is a Math notebook? How in the world does one enjoy playing with numbers?!? I despised math when I was growing up with a perfect loathing. Please share HOW to love this subject!
You know, what started it for me was cuisinaire rods and watching the videos at educationunboxed.com I had never ever been able to grasp even simple operations so clearly before. And when I learned that square numbers can really make squares I was just floored. And I was in love.
Another thing that really helped was reading the book “Let’s Play Math” by Denise Gaskins. It opened my eyes to how much there is to see and explore in the world of mathematics. I was living in the dark and now I’ve seen the light. ;) (ok, slight exaggeration there – I’m still very much in the dark, but there is light being to shine)
As far as keeping a notebook, I just write down things I want to remember, or plug random numbers into formulas that I’ve come to understand, just for the fun of seeing that the formula actually works every time. Lately I’ve been looking at Pascal’s triangle and I have been (s.l.o.w.l.y) working my way through Euclid’s geometry and I’ll write down proofs in my notebook once I fully understand.
There’s a quote by Charlotte Mason that I posted on my blog awhile back about “the principality of mathematics”. I’ll come back and post it here later if I get the chance.
Wow, thank you. I never did understand math people. I also never considered Pascal’s triangle or Euclid’s geometry. When I was about 10, my dad decided I was really good at math and put me in super advanced courses in school. I finished Trig and advanced Math in 10th grade, hating it all the way and making Cs almost all the way through. Once I gotout, I never looked back. I bitterly took a required course in probablility and statistics in college which was very dry, but that was it. Maybe I will try what you have tried. (I feel like I am saying I will try to enjoy eating lutefisk or something. LOL! Apologies to all lutefisk eaters out there! :) )
I’ve never considered myself a math person at all. I also took advanced courses through high school, always wondering what on earth I was doing in these classes and just passing that I could scrape by without anyone discovering how “dumb” I really was. Everything taught was way beyond my understanding. I was in a total fog. I think that’s partly why I find math so exciting now – because the fog of starting to lift. It’s like getting a new pair of glasses after not being able to see for a very long time. :)
Here’s the quote from CM I mentioned:
“The principality of Mathematics is a mountainous land, but the air is very fine and health-giving… you cannot lose your way, and… every step is taken on firm ground. People who seek their work or play in this principality find themselves braced by effort and satisfied with truth. “
My girls are still really little, so my reading reflects that, but wanted to recommend Mitsumasa Anno. Talk about making math concepts beautiful and pleasurable!! http://www.amazon.com/Mitsumasa-Anno/e/B000APFM94/ref=sr_tc_2_0?qid=1407617043&sr=8-2-ent
Thanks for the link!
When we have our weekly Sabbath, I intentionally leave the laundry for another day and sit down with a stack of wonderful books. I think it is good that our daughters know that one of the most important forms of leisure for me is reading.
Also, we’ve been memorizing Shakespeare and Scripture together as a family at dinner. It has been great for our children to quote these words alongside Daddy!
I began playing the piano again. Why did I ever quit?
I’ve begun practicing again too. It’s so nice to be getting back into the habit!
These past two weeks I have been listening to Beethoven on the amazon prime music app. And only Beethoven. It is when I am in the kitchen in the early mornings. And sometimes later too. Sadly, I am mostly ignorant of classical music knowledge- poor education- not appreciation though. Anyways, yesterday as I listened to my favorite pieces (again) and branched out to some other Beethoven symphonies I resolved to learn the names of what I loved and was hearing. It occurred to me that since I love Beethoven I can know his music more intimately- especially the pieces I love. And this exploration really began with the Christmas gift last year of Beethoven lives upstairs. I grew up hearing some Beethoven being played on the piano by my sister – but that little cd has brought more beauty into my life as I pay attention and am more intentional with what moves me. I have definitely noticed that my children notice me replaying and loving this music each day!
One thing I think is important is to do things for beauty’s sake and not because some expert said it will make your children smarter. For instance, listen to Mozart because you appreciate and authentically want to appreciate his work. If you read aloud makes sure the author’s use of language inspires you, then you can say to your child in wonder, “isn’t that wonderful, the way he phrased that!” Keep your own commonplace book alongside your children’s, collect your own favorite quotes and poems and share with them. Memorize poetry on your own and then share with your children. Put up beautiful pictures around your home (you can frame old calendar pictures even) and then take your children to the art gallery because you want to see the work there and because you are excited to see it you want to share that experience with a loved one.
I guess for me the real key to being a good teacher is to be openly learning and delighting myself in all that is true, good and beautiful.
I’ve just been learning about commonplace books! I am really excited to start my own.
What have you been reading to learn more about commonplacing? I do keep a commonplace myself but I’d love to see how others do it. :)
My commonplace book is simply a composition notebook. In it, I write down various things that stand out to me when I’m reading. It’s nothing fancy; but I like simple. :)
I like that idea of commonplace books! I often stop when reading aloud to talk about the description the author just gave as well. I will read it over again too so we can soak it in!
Faith, I think you make a great point here. Too often, we underestimate the power of the WHY behind why we do things. We think: Mozart is Mozart. But the *reason* matters, I agree!
That’s a great idea about keeping a commonplace book. I keep a commonplace book and it’s neat to go back and read all the various things I’ve written in it.